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Taken from The Guardian (June 4, 2015)

George Clinton or Bridget Christie: who's had the weirdest festival experience?

The captain of the mothership battles the queen of the feminist quip in our festival quiz

by Priya Elan


What’s the longest time you’ve gone without sleep?



George Clinton and Bridget Christie. Photograph: Alicia Canter/Martin Godwin

GC: Probably about three days. I don’t think I slept at all. In those days nobody went to sleep! You went to sleep on Monday morning.


BC: A day and a night. I became a bit hysterical. I was laughing at stuff like taps. It affected my performance. I don’t do drugs or drink when I perform, but I often do it when I’ve had no sleep because of various childcare issues. Sometimes something really great can come out of it because you’re working on a different level. If you’re thinking: “I don’t know how to get through a show because I’m so knackered,” it’s actually quite exciting.


(Score: GC 1)


What’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve worn at a festival?


GC: Probably a diaper full of Kotex [women’s sanitary product]. It wasn’t the old-fashioned maxi-pad.


BC: I wore a shopping basket on my head at a festival in the mid-90s. I don’t know why, because it wasn’t providing any shade or protecting me from the rain. It was really uncomfortable.


(Score: GC 1)


Have you ever invaded the stage when another performer was on at a festival?


GC: Oh, yeah. I surprised the Chili Peppers once and the roadie threw me off. In the doo-wop days I used to come onstage during the Temptations’ show and wreck their dance routines. During the rock days, we’d go and bogart anybody’s set.


BC: Can you imagine? (laughs). I’ve not actually – although I once shouted out something when a friend was performing and I was so mortified I cried for days afterwards. A friend of mine was performing and had worked in a fake situation between her and her technician where her technician was really rude, and I shouted out: ‘Do your bloody job!’ I don’t think I’ll ever get over it.


(Score: GC 1)


What’s the craziest thing that’s happened to you at a festival?


GC: Once in Toronto at this outdoor festival, I couldn’t get to the stage. I didn’t have a backstage pass. Finally, the crowd lifted me up and passed me above their heads on to the stage. It was about half a block to the stage.


BC: I went to a lot of biker festivals in the 80s. Once I woke up in a ditch with no socks on. I remember being in a field with lots of people drinking real ale and, when I woke up, I had no idea where I was. I followed the sound. I was completly fine. My socks were down the lane. I don’t think I’d do that now.


(Score: BC 1)


Have you ever had a spiritual experience at a festival?


GC: All of them were spiritual experiences back in the day. Every show was that during the Mothership time – you felt like a walking medium. At the same time as being high as hell, you can think you’re in heaven, you know?


BC: (Bursts into laughter) No, not at a festival.


(Score: GC 1)


What’s the weirdest thing you’ve eaten at a festival?


GC: I guess pussy don’t qualify, does it?


BC: I’m really fussy about food. I wouldn’t eat a weird thing. I normally eat chips and curry sauce, just to be safe. Sometimes I don’t eat anything so I don’t have to go to a toilet.


(Score: GC 1)


What’s the worst injury you’ve got at a festival?


GC: My nuts! I fell off the stage straight on to a chair. My feet barely touched the floor just before I fell and I crunched my nuts. I blanked out and fainted for about 30 seconds.


BC: Coming back from one festival in Wales in the mountains, I was caught in a blizzard.It was really frightening. I was on my own and everyone else had ridden off and not noticed that my motorbike had konked out. I managed to fix what was wrong with my bike but my hands had frozen, so I tried to change gear and had to do it with the flat of my palm. And my visor was full of snow too, so I couldn’t see anything.


(Score: BC 1)


Have you ever witnessed a riot at a festival?


GC: Several! One complete riot happened and we had to stop the show in Detroit. We used to drown out the hysteria by just playing louder. We used to keep playing even when they were throwing bottles. Pretty soon they’d stop throwing bottles. You’ve probably started throwing bottles yourself at some point.


BC: No! Although when I’ve performed at a festival, I’ve had kids throwing two-pence pieces at me.


(Score: GC 1)


Final score: GC, 6; BC, 2


BC: An impressive effort from the comic but who can seriously win against George Clinton?


GC: The captain of the Mothership proves he is king of the festival!


George Clinton plays the Wilderness festival, 6-9 August


Bridget Christie plays the Edinburgh Fringe, 8-31 August



 
 

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